Soul Matters : It takes ‘Vulnerability’ to be autistic and queer librarian

Through my local Unitarian Universalist church, I am part of a “Soul Matters Sharing Circle.” The Soul Matters program facilitates “A journey that the whole church takes together” (n.d.), through messages from the pulpit and during Religious Education as well as through small-group discussion. This month’s theme is “Vulnerability.”

Among the resources in our “Vulnerability” packet, a particular quote really stood out for me: “One of the most important things you can do on this earth is to let people know they are not alone,” attributed to Shannon L. Alder.

For me, this quote tied directly back to some of the core values of librarianship, of providing diverse books and materials that can speak to a variety of identities and circumstances.

Speaking as a librarian who is neurodivergent and queer, this is not an abstract concept for me. But it takes vulnerability to be an autistic and queer librarian, especially with a political climate that offers increasing backlash against books that mirror LGBTQIA+ experiences. This backlash extends to threats against, and harassment of, librarians who make such books available.

But at the same time, it is just so vitally important to let people know that, in the words of Alder, “they are not alone.” We need stories that, in Dr. Rudine Sims Bishop’s words (2015), offer “Mirrors, Windows, and Sliding Glass Doors” into lives and experiences both like, and unlike, our own.

Neurodivergent, “variant,” autistic, queer, and gender nonconforming. All of these are terms that I use to describe myself.

I’d always known that I was different in how I related to people, and in later years, when I finally encountered a label that described me, I checked books out from the public library in order to learn more.

But what would have happened if, when I went to the library, these resources were not available, because some censoring minds had decided that they were “inappropriate”?

“You can’t know something’s missing if you don’t know it exists. And that, to me, is sort of the greatest tragedy about all of this.”

Young Adult author Mark Oshiro uttered these words in regard to the removal of LGBTQIA+ stories from libraries and classroom shelves. You can find his statement in an article by Andrew Albanese that was published by Publishers Weekly.

“To be told your books can’t be on display or that your books are inappropriate because they simply reflect your life and experiences … it’s not only an act of censorship but an act of violence to the community.”

That’s from Deborah Caldwell-Stone, director of the American Library Associations’ Office for Intellectual Freedom, in an article by Nashelly Chavez for the Santa Rosa Press Democrat.

In June 2022, someone took all the books from a local library’s Pride display. In response, I spoke out through a letter to the local editor.

I did set some ground rules. I refused to validate the campaign that was behind the books’ removal. I refused to give free publicity to this group. So, instead, I used the space to express appreciation and gratitude to my local libraries: for curating diverse collections that spoke to my experiences, as well as offered me a window into the lives of people who were not like me (Parkhill, 2022).

The public library and its representatives also expressed positions that everyone is welcome at the library (Saarinen, 2022; Sonoma County Library Commission, 2023).

My aim as a librarian who is neurodivergent and queer is to ensure that I provide library collections that mirror my community’s diversity. The core values of librarianship insist that we, as a profession, resist attempts at censorship (ALA, 2019).

Additionally, I really value this quote by ALA president, Lessa Kanani’opua Pelayo-Lozada: “When we bring our whole selves to work and make connections with our users, we do our best work. Our personal identities allow patrons to see themselves in those who have power and authority in an institution, and our openness fosters partnership, empowering patrons in a world that often strips them of autonomy.”

I take these words as inspiration, and challenge, to express my unique self, so that library customers who are like me — who may be questioning where they fit — can find a possible answer: maybe see a place for themselves. But even while doing so, I acknowledge and affirm that doing so may make me vulnerable.

References:
Albanese, A. (2022, Oct. 26). Panel explores surge in book bans, policies targeting the LGBTQ community. Industry news: Libraries. Publishers Weekly. https://www.publishersweekly.com/pw/by-topic/industry-news/libraries/article/90740-panel-explores-surge-in-book-bans-policies-targeting-lgbtq-community.html

American Library Association. (2019). Core values of librarianship. Intellectual freedom: Issues and resources. https://www.ala.org/advocacy/intfreedom/corevalues

Bishop, R.S. (2015). “Mirrors, Windows, and Sliding Glass Doors.” Reading is Fundamental, Jan. 3, 2015. https://scenicregional.org/wp-content/uploads/2017/08/Mirrors-Windows-and-Sliding-Glass-Doors.pdf (Reprinted from “Mirrors, windows, and sliding glass doors,” 1990, Perspectives: Choosing and Using Books for the Classroom, 6 [3])

Chavez, N. (2022, June 24). Campaign to remove LGBTQ+ books from public libraries reaches Sonoma County. Press Democrat. http://bit.ly/3SD4OLD

Parkhill, C.M. (2022, June 29). A grateful library patron [letter to the editor]. Press Democrat, p. A10. https://cynthiaparkhill.blogspot.com/2022/06/letter-to-editor-supporting-libraries.html

Pelayo-Lozada, L. (2022). Representation matters. American Libraries 53(9), 4. https://americanlibrariesmagazine.org/2022/09/01/representation-matters/

Saarinen, R. (2022, July 15). Sonoma County Library is for everyone. Library news. Sonoma County Library. http://bit.ly/3Z8GpQq

Sonoma County Library Commission. (2023, March 1). 12.2: Library neutrality discussion. Library Commission meeting [Official agenda]. http://bit.ly/3mpo4jU

Soul Matters Sharing Circles. (n.d.) Our approach to small groups. About. https://www.soulmatterssharingcircle.com/our-approach.html